For three and a half days, I was at the conference, among thousands of people, and rather busy. On the afternoon of the last day, I decided not to go out, in order to get some work done.
I found myself in a dingy, stuffy, smelly motel room, all by myself. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed by unbearable loneliness. Thousands of miles away from home and family, in a dingy motel room, faced with work that I do not particularly enjoy doing, I just couldn’t do it.
So I walked out into the sunshine. It was a bright, clear day, with white clouds floating in a deep blue sky - something rarely seen in Hong Kong. The neighbourhood consists of rows and rows of quaint but picturesque red-bricked apartments. My mood lifted a bit right away. I probably would not mind living here. But I don’t belong here, at least not without my family, loved ones and friends. Why am I doing here?
This does not usually happen to me. I often travel on duty alone, enjoying the freedom of movement. I can go where I want after work, and take as much time as I want to see interesting sights, to take interesting photographs. Somehow, this time, the loneliness would not go away completely. As much fun as whatever I was doing was, it just wasn’t as much fun when the people I care about were not there with me.
Am I going soft? Or just getting old? I could not decide.
But Boston was indeed beautiful on that day.
Cheer up god-father :)
ReplyDeleteBoth. Good for you!
ReplyDeleteJust think of the scary alternative: Just getting old.
Thank you all. To be honest with you, I was scared and almost panicked.
ReplyDeleteI think that the contrast of being completely alone, vs. the busyness of the previous few days, also had something to do with it...
ReplyDeleteThat's what I thought too. Still, for a while, I couldn't stand it.
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